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Physical Touch Love Language

7/6/2020

 
With the Physical Touch Love Language, individuals tend to feel loved when they receive physical touch and affection from their partner.  Touch like hugs, kisses, hand holding, and cuddling have a large very impact on making them feel loves. This could also be kissing your partner on the cheek as they walk by, or touching their arm as you move around them in the kitchen. The touch does not have to be sexual or for a long period of time. In fact, frequency of small touches could make a bigger impact on your partner than long cuddle sessions if their love language is physical touch. If this is your partner's love language, try touching them often.  (Wondering about the difference between primary and secondary love languages?? Click here to learn more.)
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​The key is showing your love for your partner through touch. This can be through intimate sexual touch or through non-intimate/ non-sexual touching. When you partner’s love language is physical touch, they prefer being touched over the other ways of showing love like gifts or compliments. Make sure to find ways to touch your partner often. This will make them feel close and connected to you!
 
Individuals whose love language is physical touch tend to be touchy with the people who are close to them. They might hug people, play fight, tickle, or cuddle with those that are important to them. They tend to be very affectionate toward others. If this is your partner’s love language, they are longing for you to also be physically affectionate back, give them hugs and kisses, and be in physical proximity to them.

​Tips for Speaking the “Physical Touch” Love Language

If your partner’s love language is physical touch and yours isn’t; then you are probably wondering how to actually go about speaking their love language. Here are some tips:
  • Frequently give hugs and kisses to your partner.
  • Touch your partner as you walk by them—a shoulder squeeze, a hand on their back, a kiss on the cheek.
  • Give your partner massages and back rubs.
  • Play with you partners hair.
  • Cuddle while you binge your favorite show.
  • Sit next to your partner on the couch, at the table, or at a restaurant or event.
  • If you are long distance: try mailing your partner a shirt that smells like you, talk about how you want to touch them (non-sexually and sexually), and have video chats where you have each other’s undivided attention.
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Things to Avoid with the Physical Touch Love Language

Since physical touch is so important for the person whose love language is physical touch, negative touch has an equally negative impact. You’ll want to:
  • Avoid withholding affection when you are angry. During a fight, your partner will need to know you still care and one way to do that is to still hug them and touch them even when there is a disagreement.
  • Avoid going long periods without physical touch if possible. You don’t want your partner to feel neglected from love.
  • This might be obvious, but avoid any type harmful touch. Hurting your partner is never ok.
  • Avoid rejecting your partner when they touch you. If you scoff, or treat them coldly when they touch you, this will hurt them deeply. Instead be open and receptive to their touch.
​We all need love relationships to thrive in life. Part of having love relationships is knowing how to show love to others in a way that they will receive. For someone whose love language is physical touch, hugging, kissing, and holding hands helps them feel full and confident in your love. This helps them know they are important to you.
Download my FREE Guide Date Night: Ideas for Your Love Language. ​
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Elizabeth Polinsky is a marriage and couple therapist specializing in working with military members, veterans, and their families. Liz is located in Norfolk, Virginia, and provides online counseling services throughout Virginia, South Carolina, and Arkansas. ​

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My podcast, blogs, videos, newsletters, and products are general information for educational purposes only; they are not psychotherapy and not a replacement for therapy. The information provided does not constitute the formation of a therapist-patient relationship. You should consult your doctor or mental health provider regarding advice and support for your health and well being. I cannot answer questions regarding your specific situation. If you are experiencing a medical or mental health emergency, you should call 911, report to your local ER, or call the National Crisis Hotline at 1-800-273-8255. Nothing I post should be considered professional advice. The information in my 
podcast, blogs, videos, newsletters, and products are not intended to be therapy or psychological advice. The podcast, blogs, videos, newsletters, and products are not a request for a testimonial, rating, or endorsement from clients regarding counseling. If you are a current or former client/ patient, please remember that your comments may jeopardize your confidentiality. I will not “friend” or “follow” current or past clients to honor ethical boundaries and privacy; nor will I respond to comments or messages through social media or other platforms from current or past clients. Current and past client’s should only contact me through the professional contact information provided on the website. Lastly, accounts may be managed by multiple people. Therefore, comments and messages are monitored by staff and are not confidential.


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      In Communicate & Connect For Military Relationships, I provide educational tips for relationships, communication, and navigating military family life.

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      Hey, I'm Elizabeth "Liz" Polinsky and I am a marriage counselor in Virginia Beach. I provide online counseling across the states of VA, SC, AR, and NV. 

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